Help Desk Follies: We All Ask Stupid Questions, Right?

The economic woes in the financial services and housing markets are putting a pretty significant damper on life inside the data center and out, and taking a break from the seriousness that we are all facing thanks to the global nature of the economy is more important than usual. It is in that spirit that we report on an utterly silly survey of chief information officers by IT headhunter Robert Half Technology, which asked the CIOs what were the weirdest questions that their help desks have fielded.

We have all heard the one about the end user who mistook a CD-ROM drive for a coffee holder, and I am sure that this one came up. And I am sure some of the questions that RHT heard that help desks and support organizations have fielded cannot be printed in a family newsletter. But here are the top questions end users asked, according to the CIOs polled:

• “Why isn’t my wireless mouse connected to the computer?”
• “My laptop was run over by a truck. What should I do?”
• “Can you rearrange the keyboard alphabetically?”
• “How do I read my e-mail?”
• “My computer is telling me to press any key to continue. Where is the ‘any’ key?”
• “Can you reset the Internet for me?”
• “There are animal crackers in my CD-ROM drive.”
• “Can you build me a robot?”

Of course, end users sometimes do not realize that they are asking questions that reveal lots about their work ethic. Like these:

• “How can I block e-mail from my manager?”
• “Can I open the bank safe using my computer?”
• “Can you install cable TV on my PC?”
• “Can you order joysticks so that we can play video games?”
• “I’d like to stop receiving e-mail on Fridays.”

We are always complaining that IT has to supply a better grade of tech support. I think sometimes, maybe our companies have to get the help desk and tech support staff a slightly less silly group of end users to take care of–or maybe we can all just meet somewhere in the middle. Maybe for coffee and donuts. Because clearly a lot of work is not getting done anyway.

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